Monday, March 20, 2006

Noah Webster in Blog World

Here, as promised, is the best of the verification word definitions so far. I was so impressed with the creativity of all of you that I thought it would be appropriate to gather your creations in a collection. I have added some of my own comments in italics to clarify a few things, but overall these are the brain children of many of my good friends. Now, students, go out and use these words properly in your everyday conversation.

Definitions

mykdcskv - I'm embarrased to explain this to you Spruce since you clearly know already that it's the medical condition where one's head is oversized and basically "has its own weather system." It's Scottish in origin, but has etymological roots to Russian.
For those that do not know, I happen to have a huge noggin so this definition is mostly hilarious because it is an unveiled slam on me.

qemfluyw: what Chemistry graduate students, recently returned from Star Trek conferences, make in the labs to leave on the seats of the their least favorite professors.

yirssr - one of those redneck terms, I'm sure.

dtblzzlj--very few people know that this was the word that Snoop Dog was going to go with, but at the last minute, he decided on Fishizzle, both of which (as far as I know) have a broad range of definitions, from "cool" to "sick," etc.

kuqsr- An Irish insult for a stupid male. "You stupid kuqsr, stop shoplifting my potaotes!"

gnnpfunh-a private activity held on the day before NRA national meetings. Not to be confused with rflfunh, which takes place during dove season.
This is probably one of my favorite words so far.

mdjmquga- this is the word used in the Thai culture for a woman who buys and sells babies in return for turnips.

esoecpfr - someone who writes passive agressive comments about another person on their sister's blog! Nothing like a little sibling rivalry to get the blood flowing.

lwhoet - isn't that some kind of grain Matt and Erin put in their pancakes ?
This definition might actually be true. Matt and Erin are two good friends of mine who are always trying to get me to eat things like dried bamboo, sugar free sugar, various forms of "really good" organic "candy" and lwhoet.

oafspqbg - I think that is a derogatory old Celtic word meaning "large, dumb lazy man" also translated "dumbbunny"

zclob - an ancient term used to describe the drunken beating of an innocent Zebra.
I laugh every time I read this one. Remember that zclob is different than the drunken beating of a "guilty" Zebra.

Jzeuz - um yea..you're the preacher, so help me out here.
By far my favorite non-definition

hanllo - a Germanic greeting of friendship

egcsncyq - a linear charting which illustrates the degree to which your EKG and EEG tests are in sync.

eyeojnow - One little-known piece of African history is that the song "Old McDonald" was originally written in Zimbabwe by one Mr. Wamba Dia Wamba. After an initially disappointing debut in America, Mr. Wamba changed the lyrics "EYE-OJ-NOW" to "EI-EI-O" to hasten the songs acceptance into the repertoire of common American school-children. The rest, as we all know, is history.
I have no idea where Chad came up with this but it is pure genius

Acronyms - I didn't even think toask for acronyms but I received several funny ones.

MYVIKCCU - Man, you visually intimidate kids at church of christ universities...
This one is classic, because I know that I for one do visually intimidate kids at universities. Mainly because I have a large head.

dxywyko - Darn Xylophones Yearning With Yarn Knots Often

tbdrdbm - To Be Determined Right Down By Minneapolis

Words that have yet to be defined (help me out here)

ipzvr

wumpwy

Thanks for all your creativity. Keep em coming. If nobody else finds them entertaining, who cares, I find them hilarious.

Just to clarify the meanings of these words I have decided to write a short narrative using all of the words. Here goes.

Recently I went to the George R. Brown Convention Center in Houston to attend the annual meeting of the National Organization of Mykdcskv Sufferers. I was excited to be the featured speaker at this year's convention. However, as I entered the large convention center I realized that there were several groups meeting in the large meeting rooms. Not knowing where exactly to go I entered into the first room I saw. I quickly realized I was in the wrong place when I saw Charlton Heston standing at the front yelling, "Are you ready for some gnnpfunh?" With a raucous chorus of "yirssr"'s the predominately white, middle aged male crowd pulled out pistols and began firing them haphazardly at the 200 pictures of Michael Moore that adorned the walls.
I covered my head and ran for safety.

The next room I entered can only be described as a melting pot. I realized that it was an international convention when a large German man greeted me with a hearty "hanllo" and offerred me some cabbage. I was getting slightly hungry but not being a cabbage fan I opted for a steaming bowl of lwhoet which tasted how qemfluw smells and it promptly caused me to vomit all over a stack of pamphlets denouncing the practices of the Thai mdjmquga. As I stumbled away from the booth apologizing profusely I tripped over the leg of an elderly Irishman who cursed me at such a fast speed that I only caught the words oafspqbg and kuqsr.

At this point my heart was beating so fast that it probably wouldn't register on a egcsncyq but I was able to calm myself down by listening to an African children's chorus sing a precious version of Eyeojnow. The rest of the convention was fascinating. There was a booth that promised technology that could rid the Internet of spam and esoecpfr. That was really dtblzzlj. I also read some literature about an ancient religion in which people zclobbed in worship to Jzeuz, the god of the soil. Also, very dtblzzlj. To make a long story short I never got to my convention. I spent all my time studying the cultures and the vocabularies of other people. That's all for now.

4 Comments:

Blogger Ashley said...

Your genious freaks me out a little...okay a lot. You are too creative!

10:27 AM  
Blogger Shanta said...

That was awsome.

2:05 PM  
Blogger Unknown said...

I will not give any 24 spoilers, but wanted to let you know that Travis and I now think of you guys at each episode's dramatic ending......next week looks so good!

11:02 AM  
Blogger Britney K said...

Could you have any more spare time??? Just kidding. You're so hilarious! Good to see you at the wedding a few weeks ago!

3:57 PM  

Post a Comment

<< Home